Clinging to my shirt he says "I love you so much mama and it's hard to let go." These words ring in my head as I walk away thinking about it. It is truly hard to hear such words; however, I am so thankful that I even have the opportunity to hear them. For many years, I wondered if we would ever have children. My doctor indicated that this is not likely and we tried to beat odds for so long that we didn't know if our wishes would ever come true.
Now, we have two beautiful children and we decided, when Sophia came into our world, that our blessings would stop there; however, Gavin is convinced that this is not the case. He has been adamant that we really need another baby. "For Sophia, so she can have a sister, because she really needs one," is what he'll say. He also claims that he'll call her "cutie pie," but if it is a boy, he can still call him cutie pie.
I keep trying to remind him that we are a family of four and it will only be us. I have made attempts at clarifying we do not have enough space in our car, but he has it all figured out. He said we have four car seats and that we can follow each other and "all of us can go the speed limit." The baby, Gavin and daddy would ride in one car and Sophia and I can be in the other car. ...sounds perfectly logical doesn't it?
Since our night-night talks, many conversations have come up, encouraged by Gavin that we are in need of another baby. With questions being answered like, "how did our skin grow in your belly?" to "how does a baby come out of your belly?" Oh how difficult it will be to squelch his new dreams of a soft little one, because I understand his want to have a new little companion.
At this point, I am thankful that I have had my many little moments with my little people. It is "hard to let go" of them as I watch their youth slip away, knowing I will never get this again. In the meantime, to make it a little easier, I'll refer to both of them as "cutie pie" and look through pictures of my beautiful lovelies as they grew up faster than I ever imagined.
